5 years ago I had brain surgery. I could have died multiple times. I had cerebral spinal fluid leaks. I had an infection in my brain. It has been a hard journey. Daily I deal with pain. But God is greater than all my aches and pain. God has brought me through so much and will help me through today and tomorrow. I’m writing this post to remind others and myself that God will never leave you, even in the hardest times. I have felt bruised, broken, alone and misunderstood. I’ve been overwhelmed and stressed with work and dealing with physical and emotional pain. Yet in the midst of the trials, God whispers to me and says you can do it. Keep going my child. I love you. I’m proud of you. God is cheering you on. No matter how far you run, no matter how bad it gets, God’s always encouraging you to keep moving forward, to grow and change. I’ve learned more than I can express in 5 years. I look forward to what the next 5 have in store.
Brokenness is hard but beautiful to me. When you’re struggling child bring me your needs. I’m your strength and comfort in the storm. I knew you child before you were born. Lean on me and the Body of Christ. On the cross Jesus suffered and paid the price. Before that he was tempted and he was tried. Yes Jesus wept, yes he cried. He was insulted and mocked, but death set us free. Children run, run to me. Don’t try to be strong for you are weak. Learn to humble, learn to be meek. Ask me to come and help you each day. I’m the only truth, I’m the only way. Brokenness is beautiful in my eyes. Just tell me the truth, nothing’s a surprise!
Sometimes you go through times where you tell yourself over and over again, “I can do it.” As Dory would say on Finding Nemo “just keep swimming.” I am currently dealing with situations that I’ve never been trained for. Life throws curve balls and we have to adjust. This post is for those of you who are struggling to get through another day. Some situations seem hopeless. I can’t argue with the statement, “life is hard.”
The only I know to do is ask God to renew my hope. To bring hope where there is none. To bring comfort in the midst of pain. To bring peace to the chaos. To bring light to the darkness. To bring wisdom when confusion is present. When I start asking God for these things and speaking truth about who God is, I find myself filled with a little more hope. Sometimes all we need is a glimmer to help us through difficult times.
I recently started my first job as a speech language pathologist. The job came up quickly, I was hired quickly and started almost immediately. I’m going through a myriad of emotions and find myself adjusting to many new changes. I’ve struggled with anxiety during this time. I’ve been discouraged and overwhelmed. But in the midst of what seems like chaos, I know I am learning and growing. I make a conscious decision daily, often multiple times daily, to learn from my mistakes and keep going. I want to be a light to the students on my caseload and my colleagues. Changes are hard, but I have hope. Thank you Lord for giving me hope. We all need hope to help keep us going! I encourage you to embrace the change and transition. Give yourself grace as you learn. My prayer for everyone who reads this post is that peace would rest on you and that you would have an overwhelming sense of love. That grace would abound and hope would prevail.
There are some days that I find that I am scared. Sometimes I wonder if God really hears my prayers. I’m thankful that in my hurt and pain, that God calls me beloved, he calls me by my name. He tells me that I don’t have to live in shame. God I want to keep growing and becoming more like you. I don’t want to look at life as something I just have to get through. I want to love and show others what it means to be kind. No matter what happens, I want to be a light that shines. God help me, be with me today. It’s you oh Lord that I want to obey. I love you Lord, I know you really care. Thank you for hearing all my prayers!
What do you do when a loved one dies? What about when cancer strikes someone you love? What do you do when you lose a job or don’t have the money to pay the bills? These are questions that often coincide with doubt and fear, anger and bitterness. These questions strike our emotions at the core. It makes us question why we are here and what are purpose is. How are we supposed to keep going when things look so bleak?.
I’ve watched friends die of cancer. I’ve watched others recover. I’ve watched people lose jobs and watched others succeed. I’ve also watched countless people overcome tragedies and addictions and become stronger on the other end. When I am struggling with doubt, fear, anger and bitterness I find myself turning to the Bible.
The Bible is filled with countless times of how God provided in the midst of trials. He didn’t always come through the way people expected and often it was not on their time. People could point to countless stories asking why did God let that happen. I can’t answer those questions, but I can say that when I read the Bible I see his provision from start to finish.
God can use anything even tragedy to touch this world in a positive way. There are many stories I could reference, but for now I will reference Joseph. He was sold into slavery by his brothers and put into prison in a foreign land. Years later God used him to save a region and his family. God used what the enemy meant for evil for good. If you asked Joseph today I’m sure he would say for years he suffered great anguish and loss, but at the end of his life he would say it was worth it. There are others in mentioned in Hebrews 11 that were not worthy of this earth.
People have suffered horrendous, imaginable tragedy and death. I’m sorry for the pain you have experienced. My prayer is that you turn to God for comfort and ask him to help you through your pain. He will meet you where you are at. I can’t say he will show up in the way you want him to or speak the words you want to hear, but he will not leave you.
God loved the world and sent his Son, Jesus to the earth as a man. He was perfect and died and paid the debt of all the wrongs (sin) mankind did and would do. He rose from the dead on the third day. Though Jesus is not here on earth today, the Holy Spirit is available to all who believe. If you believe the statements I wrote above, ask the Holy Spirit to come into your life. He will guide you throughout life. He is your direct connection to God. You can actually talk to God, he likes it. He wants to have a relationship with you.
The band Love and the Outcome have a song called “He is With Us” that has helped me when I can’t “feel” God and it seems he is a million miles away. In Proverbs 3:5-6 it says, “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him and he will make your paths straight.”
Depending on where you live you may have experienced all 4 season in the natural: spring, summer, fall and winter. But whether you have experienced these climates in the natural, we all have experienced them emotionally!
I’ve played sports and been cruising along reaping benefits from hours of hard work like in the fall season. Then all of a sudden I experienced an injury and suddenly found myself in winter. Winter seemed to last a long time when surgeries were required or I had to rehab for months. But as I healed I found myself in spring, feeling hope again and looking forward to life back in full swing. This is one example of how I’ve related to seasons emotionally and physically.
There are so many different things I could relate back to seasons: family, jobs, education, etc… What I want to focus on for the remainder of this post is reminding you that you can learn a lesson in every season. I’m not saying you will or have to enjoy every season. However, difficult times do bring perspective and when you are on the other side you can look back and see how you grew. Finding things to be thankful for has helped me through some of the hardest times. Choosing to celebrate small victories helped me. To this day, I try to set small goals each day to help me move towards larger ones.
No matter what season you are in I want you to know you are loved for who you are and that you can make a difference. I hate pain, but I love being on the other side and cheering people on as they conquer their own battles. Don’t give up! You can face another day!